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    The Glass Ceiling

    By Brad McCloskey
    September 1, 2001

    Vince McMahon is in his comfortable office, pouring over the details of the next Smackdown. He hears a knock on his door, causing him to look up from the stack of papers on his desk.

    Vince: Come in. Oh hey, Mark, how are you?

    Undertaker: (approaches Vince, shaking his hand) Not bad, not bad at all. I see you're kinda busy, so I could come back...

    Vince: No no no, the paperwork can wait. Any time a man who's been with the company for over ten years needs something, all he needs to do is ask. A man's time is very valuable indeed, and ten years of a man's life is easily worth a few moments of mine.

    (A faint knock is once again hear on Vince's door)

    Vince: Yes, come in.


    (The Brooklyn Brawler, Steve Lombardi meekly approaches Vince and Taker)

    Steve: Um, sorry to intrude Vince. Um, I'll make this short as I can. My wife needs surgery and I was wondering if I could take some time off to...

    Vince: No.

    Steve: No? But it's only gonna be a few days. Besides, I don't even wrestle on tv any more so I..

    Vince: Damn it, Steve. Only a few days. Only a few days? How selfish can you be? The company NEEDS everyone to pull their weight at this time of need. Things are chaotic in the WWF right now! View ship is falling, ratings are sliding...

    Steve: Actually, Vince, the ratings have risen steadily since..

    Vince: ...and everyone...from the road agents, to the wrestlers, to myself, HAVE to pull together to fight this! We WILL rise again! Damn it, I'm Vince McMahon and vengeance will be mine!!

    Steve: ...

    Vince: Go. Please, just go. I can't bare to even look at a man who would so easily turn his back on the company for personal gains. Just go. And leave the door open.

    (Steve, looking more confused than angry, exits the room)


    Vince: I'm sorry about that, Mark. Now, you had something to talk to me about?

    Undertaker: Yeah, Vince. There's a Harley show in Detroit next month and I need....

    Vince: A month off? You got it.

    Undertaker: Well, no. I really just needed...

    Vince: No, no no, how selfish of me. Gold, you want more gold? Hell, I could line up Hurricane Helms and Kanyon in a handicap match for ya, and have you add their belts to your collection?

    Undertaker: Ha ha ha, Jeez Vince all I really wanted was a few weeks off. But now that you mention it....

    (Vince returns to his desk, and pencils in the changes)

    Vince: Consider it done. Gotta keep rollin, rollin, rollin, don't we big guy?

    (They both share an insane cackle of laughter together)

    Undertaker: Oh, one other thing I needed to talk to you about was a couple of the new guys.

    Vince: Ah, yes, the WCW talent I assume. What of it?

    Undertaker: Yeah, I was in the locker room with Kane one day, and we were talking about how to sell in our big match coming up. All of a sudden, Chuck Palumbo and Shawn O'Haire came in.

    Vince: Uh oh. Did they say some disrespectful comments to you guys?

    Undertaker: No, they walked up to the table we were at and sat down next to us. Then, after they had out attention, they introduced their selves to us. They followed this by SHAKING OUR HANDS FROM THE SITTING POSITION!

    Vince: What?!?! They did that? I can't believe....I thought they knew how things worked around here.

    Undertaker: Yeah, Kane and I were totally stunned for a while.

    Vince: That's completely expected. Why they would not STAND as they're showing their respect to you is beyond me.Oh, those arrogant little hotheads Think they're better than us, do they?

    Undertaker: A message needs to be sent to the new guys. So what can you do about it?

    Vince: Let's see, you've already taken the belts off them and pretty much destroyed them every time you wrestled. I know! How does pitting them in a match against Terri and Lita sound?

    Undertaker: Vince, that's ridiculous.

    Vince: Shit, you're right, I wasn't thinking. A handicap match against ONLY Terri.

    Undertaker: Now we're talking. What's the finish gonna be?

    Vince: A clean pin over Palumbo after O'Haire accidentally clotheslines his own partner.

    Undertaker: Vince, you're a genius. Hey, I gotta run though, thanks for the time off and the gold.

    Vince: Any time, Mark. Take care.

    (Undertaker exits the room)


    Vince: Okay then, back to the task at hand. Nothing is ever ea....oh wait, now I remember.

    (Vince has DDP paged to his office. A few moments later, an obviously injured DDP comes hobbling into the office)

    Vince: There you are. There's something that I need to address with you.

    DDP: Vince, there's something I've wanted to get off my chest too, if you have the time. Can I please talk to you about it?

    Vince: (irritated) Ugh, always "me, me me". Fine. What is it?

    DDP: Well, as I'm sure you understand, I'm kinda injured right now and need surgery in the next few short while. Anyway, I was just wondering if I could get the next while off, before the surgery and while I recover. You see...

    Vince: Wait wait. Dallas, I'm already giving you all the time off you need to recover from the surgery. I would assume that's enough, you can't just expect the angle to be dropped just like that before of an injury.

    DDP: Um, Vince, you had Sara pin me in a match last week. The night before, Undertaker pretty much beat the living crap out of me. I thought that meant the angle was finished and we could do something fresh with my character.

    Vince: Double turn.

    DDP: Um, what?

    Vince: A double turn! On next week's RAW, I see a HUGE change in your character coming up, Dallas, oh yes I do!

    DDP: (starting to smile) Vince..really? Wow, like don't get me wrong or anything, I totally appreciate what you've done with me so far. Revealing me as the stalker was one of the best nights in my career so I don't want to seem like I'm ungrateful in any way.

    Vince:(also smiling) Dallas, don't mention it. Now, I'll just need to ask that you work through ONE more match, though. Can you do it, Dallas?

    DDP: Hell, yeah! So what's on tap, boss?

    Vince: Well remember in Wrestlemania 13 in that match with Austin and Bret Hart? How after it ended, the results of the match caused the infamous double turn...Bret became the heel, and Steve became the face?

    DDP: Oh, yeah, that was classic. The whole psychology behind it was amazing.

    Vince: Well, we're gonna do the same thing with you. We're gonna turn you face the same way.

    DDP: I like it, Vince, I really like it.

    Vince: Great! Now, when you face Sara in....

    DDP: (stunned) Um, Sara? What does she have to do with....

    Vince: ....a no DQ match on RAW next week, we're going to the old-school tactic of playing off the crowd's sympathy. After she hits you with the Diamond Cutter....

    DDP: Bu...I..diamond....

    Vince:... the crowd will be so irate with her for using YOUR signature move, that she will be the biggest heel in the business, and turning you into the biggest face in the industry!! Yes, damn it, yes!. I love it! What do you think, Dallas?

    DDP: Um. if you're gonna keep me on tv, why can't I just have a regular match with one of the guys?

    Vince: Ha ha ha, don't be absurd, Dallas! I care about the safety of my performers and I will not risk an injury to one of my favorite top hands. No sir, you'll have a nice easy match with Sara and relax....


    (Jeff Hardy enters the room)

    Vince: Oh, crap, I forgot! Jeff, Jeff, how are you? I just wanted to remind you about the Flaming Table match you have with RVD on Smackdown this week. One thing, I know your back is killing you, so when you do the spot where you fall backwards off a twenty foot ladder on to broken glass, try to land on your SIDE. The paramedics will be backstage, door 15.

    Jeff: Okey dokey.

    (Jeff Hardy exists the room)


    Vince: Ah yes, damn it, I'm in a good mood now, Dallas, I really am. That double turn on RAW is gonna put ratings through the ROOF, no doubt about it. Oh, do you wanna hear the finish?

    DDP:...

    Vince: Remember Royal Rumble 1999? How all those chair shots gave The Rock so much heat?

    DDP:...

    Vince: We're gonna have Sara hit you with TWICE as many! Twice the heat, baby!! Then, after the Diamond Cutter, we're.....Dallas?

    (DDP apparently goes off to vomit somewhere)

    Vince: Hmm, must be tired. Poor guy.


    (HHH enters the room)

    HHH: Heya Vince, how's it going??

    Vince: Hunter! Man, it's been ages since you've been here!!

    (They embrace in a warm, touching moment)

    HHH: Yeah, Vince, I've missed the old office, I've been pretty busy with my rehab. However, there's something I wanted to ask you, since my leg has been feeling really good lately....

    Vince: Anything. What's up?

    End of Part One.


    Brad McCloskey
    Send feedback to Aenima@tpww.net

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