By Triple A on January 28, 2004 at 4:28 PM EST

Report courtesy of Hammer and PWInsider.com:

Dark match: Palumbo & Stamboli defeated Mike Kruel & John Walters who apparently lives in Washington DC (I know cheap face pop).

Josh Matthews & Michael Cole come to the ring for Velocity tapings:

Funaki defeated Akio.
Ultimo Dragon defeated Shannon Moore in a solid match in my opinion.
Sakoda defeated Scotty 2 Hotty with the foot on the ropes. Scotty was over like crazy

A service woman sings the National Anthem, Tazz comes out and we have the Smackdown tapings.

1. Paul Heyman is in the ring introducing us to the show but before he can say anything, Vincent Kennedy McMahon struts (or waddles) to the ring. Vince said that this should have been a historic moment for Smackdown that was ruined because Chris Benoit went to RAW. When asked to explain himself, Heyman says "Screw Chris Benoit" and uses Hall & Nash, Hogan, and Bret Hart as example of things Vince has done in the same situation. Paul then announced a 15 man Royal Rumble match with the winner facing Lesnar.

2. The beginning of many skits involving wrestlers selecting numbers, Dawn Marie with the lottery bin, and as many sexual references to Dawn and playing with balls as possible.

3. The Bashams beat Paul London & Billy Kidman to keep the title when Kidman gets his legs taken out while doing the SSP (a move London should be doing, but I digress) by Danny Basham, a switch behind the refs back, and a DDT from the top rope.

4. Once again Chavo Guerrero Sr. can't understand why his own flesh and blood would do such damage to him. Chavo says he will get revenge.

5. Rey Mysterio defeated Jamie Noble in a great match that featured lots of new moves from both guys. The big story here was the ending. Noble ducks the West Coast Pop and Rey goes to the floor. As Noble gets ready to leap on Rey, Nidia starts wandering around and blocks him "by accident". Noble gets pissed, drags Nidia to the ring and whips her into the ropes for a clothesline. But Nidia ducked to the surprise of Noble and Rey get the West Coast Pop for the pin. After that Nidia shows that she really wasn't blind after all.

6. In the back Eddie Guerrero is taken out in the bathroom and is laid out. As Rey Mysterio is checking on him, Chavo Jr and Sr come in wondering what is going on. Rey accuses them but says they didn't do it. Moments later they show him put in the ambulance. About 20 minutes or so later, Heyman tells Angle (who wonders what the hell is going on) that he regained consciousness and his spot in the rumble is still available.

7. Josh Matthews asks Brock Lesnar if he "fears" Goldberg, which pisses off the champ. He says that people will be calling Goldberg the "Brock Lesnar wanna be". And then challenged anyone to a non title match. Which turns out to be unfortunately Orlando Jordan is a rather sloppy match with a really, really long rest period. Orlando taps out to the Brock Lock, or Sicilian Slice for Tony Mamaluke fans.

8. The final 4 in the Royal Rumble was Billy Gunn, Rikishi (15th selection), Kurt Angle (who was 1st), and Eddie Guerrero who sold his "Injury" for about 5 minutes and then wrestled like nothing was wrong. John Cena was in the rumble but was selling the leg injury he got at the Royal Rumble PPV. After Cena was eliminated by Big Show, Cena helped Show get eliminated with the help of a few other guys. Came down to Eddie and Kurt who then wrestled for another 10 minutes. Highlights of the match was many times both wrestlers has one foot on the floor it seemed. Eddie wins when he suplexes Kurt outside the ring.